SingalongaMay

by Half Bam Half Whisky

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1.
Back To The Troubles with the old backstop And cry boys cry Don't let your joy and laughter put you off Why oh why oh why What's the use of good friday It never was worthwhile So back to the troubles with the old backstop And cry, cry, cry I'm looking over at Michael Gove And I wish that my eyes would melt First it was Johnson, with lies on a bus Then it was Davis and his grinning pus There's no need explaining No-one's remaining all the cards have been dealt I'm looking over at Michael Gove And I wish my eyes would melt Boiled beef on pallets Boiled beef on pallets That's the stuff for your Brexit fare You'll get your chips from a carpenter Don't live like vegetarians On aubergines and carrots Blow out your kite from morn' till night On boiled beef on pallets Run Dominic Raab, run, run, run Run Raab, run Raab, run, run, run Bang, bang, bang, bang goes the people's gun Run Raab, run Raab, run, run, run Run Tommy, run Tommy Robinson Run Tommy, run Tommy Robinson Bang, bang, bang, bang goes the people's gun Run Tommy, run Tommy Robinson Treeza May said follow article 50 And don't dilly dally on the way Over the cliff now it's all been triggered Off went the leavers - they cheered and sniggered And they dillied and dallied Dallied and dillied Lost the plot and don't know what to say What is the point in kicking the can further What's the point of Treeza May?
2.
Go Brexit 02:35
(Together) we will leave someday (Together) never mind about Scotland eh? (Together) and Northern Ireland (Together) looks like you've made your own plans (Together) you keep saying we're better (Together) you even write love letters (Together) well I semell shite (Together) off the new far right Go Brexit Abandon hope Go Brexit No mess I hope Go Brexit This is what we're gonna do Go Brexit - fuck you and you and you and you (Together) marching as to war (Together) what do you need food for? (Together) you'll learn to get by (Together) eating humble pie (I love you) We've heard that before (I want you) Look - there's the door (So that's why) we don't believe you cunts (When you say) we're a family of nations Go Brexit My kingdom for a tin of beans Go Brexit Nurse - the screens Go Brexit The empire and The Sun Go Brexit - look wot u dun Go Brexit Abandon hope Go Brexit No mess I hope Go Brexit This is what we're gonna do Go Brexit - fuck you and you and you
3.
Mention 'impact assessments' just once more and I'll more than likely kill you Merkel, Merkel Angela Merkel you fervently moan is this a Pandora's box I have unleashed and have you seen Schrodinger's cat? Michael Gove's head looks uncannily like a blancmange And all those people who you romantically like to believe are on your side are not and they'll wipe their snot on the arm of your chair as you put another Jean-Claude Juncker poster on the wall God I could straighten all the bananas and I'd erect a giant Britannia on the white cliffs of Dover or maybe Winston Churchill flicking the Vs at the French and in fields of wheat we could carve Theresa May suggesting we faint at her beauty but she's got David Davis eyes And all those people who you romantically like to believe are on your side are not and they'll wipe their snot on the arm of your chair as you put another Michel Barnier poster on the wall And all those people who you romantically like to believe are on your side are not and they'll wipe their snot on the arm of your chair as you put another Guy Verhofstadt poster on the wall
4.
I am Jacob, look at me I'm fwom the nineteenth centuwy I know Latin, I know Gweek That mummy May has got a cheek She said that I was a big baby But it's not twoo cos Nanny said to me Na noo noo noo na na na na Is what my nanny said to me Na noo noo noo na na na na Nanny was a... nazi Na noo noo noo na na na na I'm taking back my cuntwy Na noo noo noo na na na na I'll thcweam if you don't give it me I am a pwoper politician (It's twoo it's twoo) Me and my chums have got permission (It's twoo. I know because I do) To pway wiv letters and wiv cwayons And also hav a wittle seance Even nanny said it's scawy We're bwinging back the ghost of Diswaeli Na noo noo noo na na na na Is what my nanny said to me Na noo noo noo na na na na Nanny was a... nazi Na noo noo noo na na na na I'm taking back my cuntwy Na noo noo noo na na na na I'll thcweam if you don't give it me (She is da boss of all da world and she can do anyfing wot she wants)
5.
Don't you hate the way she seems to enjoy it? Clinging on to power like piles Round the arse of British politics Totally in denial Nothing's happening and it's happening right now But that's not the way she sees it She's just counting down the hours Saying it's nothing to do with May Nothing has changed Nothing
6.
Red lorry, yellow lorry Parking on a runway Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled Brexit It's insane Little Billy Brexit won't eat Greggs shit If he sees a vegetable he decks it He's insane 2 Y's U R 2 Y's U B. I C U R. 2 Y's 4 me How many boards Could the Mongols hoard If the Mongol hordes got bored? I saw Theresa sitting in a shoe shine shop Where she sits she shines, and where she shines she sits She sells Brexit, fecks it, wrecks it Legs it it's a mess and it's insane Stop all the clocks It's Operation Brock A rehearsal for chaos Insane How can a clam cram in a clean cream can? Clean clams crammed in clean cans. Rory the warrior and Roger the worrier were reared wrongly in a rural brewery Seth at Sainsbury's sells thick socks Rhys watched Ross switch his Irish wristwatch for a Swiss wristwatch. She sells Brexit, fecks it, wrecks it Legs it it's a mess and it's insane
7.
There was an old lady who swallowed a lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who abandoned a vote; Instead of debating she just grabbed her coat. She abandoned the vote to protect the lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - Perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who ignored public voices "It's the will of the people" she screamed in their faces She ignored the voices and abandoned the vote; Instead of debating she just grabbed her coat. She abandoned the vote to protect the lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - Perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who laughed at experts, who said trade would collapse and people'd get hurt She laughed at the experts who agreed with the voices She ignored the voices and abandoned the vote; Instead of debating she just grabbed her coat. She abandoned the vote to protect the lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - Perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who hired a ferry; To fix the trade routes she'd damaged in her hurry She hired a ferry to laugh at the experts She laughed at the experts who agreed with the voices She ignored the voices and abandoned the vote; Instead of debating she just grabbed her coat. She abandoned the vote to protect the lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - Perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who swallowed Liam Fox And Michael Gove and all the Queen's yachts She swallowed the yachts to replace the ferry She hired a ferry to laugh at the experts She laughed at the experts who agreed with the voices She ignored the voices and abandoned the vote; Instead of debating she just grabbed her coat. She abandoned the vote to protect the lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - Perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who swallowed the Scots Who stuck in her throat and made her throw up She swallowed the Scots to sink the yachts She swallowed the yachts to replace the ferry She hired a ferry to laugh at the experts She laughed at the experts who agreed with the voices She ignored the voices and abandoned the vote; Instead of debating she just grabbed her coat. She abandoned the vote to protect the lie; I don't know why she swallowed a lie - Perhaps we'll die There was an old lady who really fucked up She's dead as a duck
8.
Here we come Walking down the street Our organ grinder is running Through a field of wheat Hey hey we're her monkeys People say we monkey around We're flinging shit at strangers And rampaging through your town Theresa May Monkeys We haven't got a clue Look at our smug faces Tell us what to do We're trying to run the country Come and watch us throw it away We're the fucked generation We've got fuck all to say
9.
A few stolen doughnuts is all that we see You've got a brand new can of corned beef and I've got a brand new key Though I've tried to resist putting tripe on the list And a tin of spam just won't do So I'm stockpiling my beans for you It's not very easy living on fried dust My friends try and tempt me with stale pizza crust But each time I try I just break down and cry 'Cause I'd rather be home sniffing glue So I'm stockpiling my beans for you You used to tell me we'd be better together Don't panic buy one get one free You said be patient just wait a little longer But that's just an old fantasy I've got to get breakfast just some grit from the floor Cos cat litter muesli I can't take any more And tonight is the night for eating dog shite We'll be on the bog the whole night through So I'm stockpiling my beans Yes I'm stockpiling my beans Yes I'm stockpiling my beans for you
10.
We're all going on a summer recess No more working for a month or two We'll leave the cuntry in a right mess Nothing left for us to do Fuck you We're gonna leave it up to Putin He'll know what to do We've seen it in the movies Terminator 2 Everybody has a summer recess We can do whatever we want to We have cheated and we couldn't care less We'll make our dreams come true For us fuck you Oh yes fuck you
11.
How has it come to this you say? A pig boy did it and ran away We're in the shit, he's making hay A pig boy did it and ran away We used to care about equality We couldn't care less about Europe, eh? Then this twat landed us with May A pig boy did it and ran away Raab, Johnson, Davis, McVey A pig boy did it and ran away Stood for nothing, oh they're OK A pig boy did it and ran away The future's orange, the future's grey A pig boy did it and ran away Because one dick, he shagged porky A pig boy did it and ran away A poundshop Liza Minelli Money makes the poverty A grim old boys cabaret A pig boy did it and ran away Get back in your shed, man You're a fucking dead man Walking next to Farage Stuff yer fucking memoirs Camer camer camer camer camer camer Cameron Look what you done, you dish faced scum Living would be easy if we'd never set eyes on you And your boys in blue Your poison blue A pig boy did it and ran away A pig boy did it and ran away A pig boy did it and ran away A pig boy did it and ran away
12.
This is a Brexit. Got the runs in the end. It touches almost every area. And am I going to see this through? Yes... Brexit's good to me, you know It makes me feel free, you know I must go I'm in government and I resign May says she is fine, you know She tells us all the time, you know She said so I'm in government and I resign I'm so glad that I get off scot free I'm so glad, I'll get a consultancy That there baby buys me things, you know It buys me diamond rings, you know I must go I'm in government and I resign Free movement Geoffrey Boycott stuck to it And he got the runs in the end And I understand some people feel uncomfortable About the details in the backstop Yes - difficult and sometimes uncomfortable I'm sorry When I leave the cabinet I'll get a better job, you bet I'll be minted I'm in government and I resign I'm so glad that I can walk away I'm so glad, I don't have to take the blame It's great being a defector I'll be a company director Or CEO I'm in government and I resign I'm in government and I resign
13.
I am not a fish-thrower, I am a Rees Mogg! I am not a fish-thrower, Yubby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dum. Call me Jacob unless you are from Cambridge Analytica Oi! I don't have to work hard. Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum. Cos I am a biddy biddy rich, Idle-diddle-daidle-daidle man. I've got a big tall hat and many little children, But I've never changed a nappy once. That's a job for nanny don't you know. I will be even more minted after the Brexit, What a jolly fine coincidence, I'll buy a bigger mansion, just for show. And I will show the oiks just what a man can do With the mettle of my blade Brandishing my sword like Flashman or John Bull I will throw barbs and witticisms like a card And man the Latin speakers barricade I'm not taking the piscine for the old school Cos I am not a fish-thrower, Yubby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dum. Call me Jacob unless you are from Cambridge Analytica Oi! I don't have to work hard. Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum. Cos I am a biddy biddy rich, Idle-diddle-daidle-daidle man..
14.
Nebulous 03:40
Nebulous No free movement of people The EU will fight ya down (tell me why) When you see Junker. (Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha) Let me tell you if you're not wrong (then, why?) Everything is all right So we gonna walk over the cliffs of Dover We all know it's over (tell me why) Trod through wheat fields and clover Nebulous - no free movement of people Nebulous - no free movement of people Open your eyes and look within Are you satisfied with the life you're living? We don't know where we're going We don't know where we're from We're leaving Babylon We're going to our fantasy land Nebulous - no free movement of people (No free movement of people) send us another bent banana (No free movement of people) over the English Channel (No free movement of people) send us another bent banana (No free movement of people) over the English Channel (No free movement of people) Nebulous No free movement of people Nebulous Nebulous
15.
Here we go Round and round the floor Together in shite Pure bullshit Over bloody Brexit Whatever This time Theresa and Jeremy We should put them out of their misery Whatever It's time They shoot horses don't they? They shoot horses don't they? They should or, say, stone them My arse is numb A phantom rectum When is it we go? It seems so long Just like a marathon Mr Arse meet Mr Elbow It's making no sense But we're all fucked in the end Whatever It's time They shoot horseshit don't they? They shoot horseshit don't they? They shoot horseshit don't they?
16.
Humility is rising, Theresa's' getting low According to all sources, she hasn't long to go 'Cause tonight for the first time In the houses of parliament For the first time in history The government's in contempt Of parliament, hallelujah, the government in contempt I'm gonna go out on a limb and say this feels Like the beginning of the end The government, hallelujah Are in contempt, of parliament Don't let your arse hit the door On the way out, strong and stable no more Theresa May has lost as many votes in one day As Gordon Brown did in his entire PM stay Banging on about Brexit to every MP So that each and every one of them could make the government be In contempt
17.
Please allow me to introduce myself I'm the woman in yellow on bbcqt I'm not taking it anymore Theresa May - I have no sympathy
18.
Mouldy May 01:41
Wake up, Theresa, I think I got something to say to you It's time for breakfast and you really should be eating food I know you like gammon and ham, but I've only got some jam Oh, Theresa, I couldn't have fried eggs any more Your bread is full of holes And the jam has a layer of mould Your roll is hard, and that's what really hurts I got The Sun, and it's got your face on the front page But that don't worry me none, it's the fungus on your marmalade Your albumen and yokes They're giving me the dry boak Oh, Theresa, I couldn't have fried any more Just eat your cereal At least that's bearable Oh no, the milk has turned rancid now
19.
Why don't you ask May if she's going to stay? Why don't you ask Corbyn if he's going away? Why don't you tell me what's going on? Why don't you tell me who has a plan? Why don't you ask Tusk what's going on? Why don't you ask him who's the latest on the throne? Don't say that you love me Just tell me that you want me Tusk (toosk) Just quote me Danté Just quote me Danté "I was keen to look round, and I saw people in that marsh, Naked, and filthy, and furious. They didn't just punch each other but used heads, bodies and feet, Even their teeth to bite off bits of meat."
20.
Posh People 02:58
Posh people got no reason Posh people got no reason Posh people got no reason To live They sit in the commons Passing bills And they haven't got Any discernible skills They eat posh olives With their posh little teeth They have very little knowledge They've never been to Cowdenbeath Well, I don't want no posh people Don't want no posh people Don't want no posh people 'Round here Posh people are just the same As you and I ('cept for inherited wealth) All men are brothers Until the day they die (if they can pay for good health) Posh people got nobody Posh people got nobody Posh people got nobody To love They got no chins And they look down their nose They drink Pimms From Waitrose They got posh cars That go wha, wha ,wha They got posh voices Goin' what, what, what They got grubby little peerages And dirty little minds They're gonna get you every time Well, I don't want no posh people Don't want no posh people Don't want no posh people 'Round here

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released March 4, 2019

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Half Bam Half Whisky Edinburgh, UK

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