Artificial Indifference, by Half Bam Half Whisky

Artificial Indifference

by Half Bam Half Whisky

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1.	A.I. (Emergency Alert) 01:13	lyrics	buy track
Eh, I made a song of the emergency alert I am not alarmed but my ears are hurt So now if it goes off and just before you’re dead You won’t be able to get this song out of your head
2.	I Was A Teenage HP Lovecraft Fan 01:55	lyrics	buy track
The very first song that I wrote was ‘Into The Abyss’ I think the chords were G and A It was very serious – a scream from deep within Expressing my fear – I had a plan I was a teenage HP Lovecraft fan I used to try and throw ungeometric shapes To get inside the mind of Mr L And get into all kinds of tentacle based scrapes This did not prepare me for adulthood, maaaaan But I was a teenage HP Lovecraft fan How do you say Cthulu if you have a lisp How did you feel when you found out he was fascist Well most of us grow out of these things, but some of us do not Some fantasise, some idolise, unhappy with their lot I was a teenage HP Lovecraft fan
3.	Beachball Security Guard 01:53	lyrics	buy track
Beachball Security Beachball Security Beachball Security Guard There was an alien walking down the street In a city in Russia on a satellite feed I made a call to TASS The guy on the line said Sir, we are TASS – we don’t make things up Sure… or maybe not He sees all the games for free Beachball security He’s got sand in his eyes But he don’t tell lies He works for the truth agency Beachball Security Gotta bounce
4.	Kettled By The Rozzers 01:15	lyrics	buy track
The Home Secretary Is pretty fucking scary Calls the cops to the corner shop To stop them getting lary It’s getting pretty raucous In the local post office Save us Suella from the hell Of all of these slow walkers Kettled by the rozzers Kettled by the rozzers Kettled by the rozzers In the post office queue Kettled by the rozzers Kettled by the rozzers Kettled by the rozzers In the post office queue
5.	Squirrel In My House 01:05	lyrics	buy track
There’s a squirrel in my house Squirrelling memories Squirelling money Where Peter used to be Only shadows from the past I see Time seems to have erased The vision of his smiling face Now the polis have sent A great big incident tent There’s a squirrel in my house I can’t hide (Ghost in my house) From the stash of cash that’s inside (Ghost in my house) It keeps on haunting me (Ghost in my house) Just keeps on reminding me (Ghost in my house) I just keep hearing his footsteps on the stairs When I know there’s no-one there Every day more amounts Just resting in my account
6.	Wes 02:47	lyrics	buy track
Wes Anderson makes stlyish movies Ken Loach’s tend to be more gritty With a colourful bird of prey Ken’s cinéma vérité Could make a great documentary On Wes making a movie (A great documentary) Ken would get Wes running here and there (here and there) With a kestrel hovering in the air (in the air) Just think of the great drone shots And the wacky plots With ridiculous twists And gauntlets covering wrists (And gauntlets covering wrists) I used to say “I” and “me” Now it’s “Wes”, now it’s “we” (I used to say “I” and “me”) (Now it’s “Wes”, now it’s “we”) Ken, most people would turn you away (turn you away) I don’t listen to a word they say (a word they say) They don’t see you as I do I wish they would try to I’m sure they’d think again If they had a friend like Ken Like Ken (Like Ken) Like Ken
7.	Step We Gaily (Diddley remix) 03:59	info	buy track
8.	My Toilet Chandelier 00:53	lyrics	buy track
If you need a number two I have a wee surprise for you I don’t know what else to do To hide the fingerprints, do you? All the evidence has shown that It’s a witch hunt, I am alone I skirt around the danger zone And don’t talk about it later Observe the boxes by the wall Their mocking smile says it all They record the rise and fall Of every movement made here But the only movement now is me I’m fighting things I cannot see I think it’s called my destiny But I’m not changing My toilet chandelier
9.	Milf Sword Thirst 02:09	lyrics	buy track
Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration Milf sword thirst* The heroine of the coronation (Poundland headband decoration) Four cats, forecast: ruination (Poundland headband decoration) A million tories burst A mordant being, cursed Milf sword thirst Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration She doing a Christmas fitness video? Penny for the guy oh no no no She’s the nation’s new favourite Tory If you’re over ninety two Or under three Poundland headband decoration Poundland garland declaration Poundland headband decoration Poundland headband decoration
10.	Do The Pterygoid Walk 01:22	lyrics	buy track
If you’re a snake who wants to swallow a frog You gotta learn to do the pterygoid walk I saw it last night on Springwatch Lucy Lapwing made a prop Do the do the do the pterygoid walk Do the do the do the pterygoid walk Manipulate your mouth muscles and let your jaw drop And you’ll be doing the pterygoid walk Just open up your face and move your bones wide And wiggle your head from side to side You can learn to swallow almost anything whole A frog, a toad, or a rat or a vole Do the do the do the pterygoid walk…
11.	Hologram Of Love 03:28	lyrics	buy track
In a world of wonders, where dreams collide, There’s a child, unique, they can’t hide, They shimmer in the darkness, a spectral light, Identifying as a hologram, shining so bright. (Chorus) They say, “You’re just a child, but what do they know? Inside this prism, my spirit’s gonna grow, I may be intangible, but I’m not less than real, A hologram of love, with emotions I can feel.” In pixelated pathways, they navigate, A realm of code and circuits, their fate, Misunderstood by those who see only the flesh, But the hologram child knows they’re more than just mesh. (Chorus) They say, “You’re just a child, but what do they know? Inside this prism, my spirit’s gonna grow, I may be intangible, but I’m not less than real, A hologram of love, with emotions I can feel.” In a world of boundaries, they’re breaking free, A holographic beacon, for all to see, They defy the limitations, society’s chains, With a hologram heart, they’ll rewrite the refrains. Through the ethereal whispers, they find their way, Connecting to others who’ve lost their say, Together they’ll dance, in a pixelated trance, A hologram revolution, the world will enhance. (Chorus) They say, “You’re just a child, but what do they know? Inside this prism, my spirit’s gonna grow, I may be intangible, but I’m not less than real, A hologram of love, with emotions I can feel.”
12.	War Against Artificial Intelligence 01:10	info	buy track
13.	Cabaret Voltaylor 04:42	info	buy track